Peace, Be still

In April 2013, I packed my bags, tearfully kissed my husband goodbye and set off for a month and a half trip to student teach in Spain. I was prepared for this trip to change how I viewed the world, my cultural appreciation, and my educational philosophy…but I was not prepared for how much this trip would change my life. I was definitely not prepared to see all of plans I had for my future blown to pieces.

But it did.

From the second I stepped off the plane, I instantly fell in love with Spain. The noise, the food, the culture, the people…I fell in love hard. However, none of that love comes close to the love I felt when I met the church in Barcelona, Spain. Although I didn't speak more than two words in Spanish, they opened up their arms, their hearts, and their homes to me. I was overwhelmed by kisses and hugs because love is the universal language. We used pictures and charades and synonyms and Spanglish seasoned with laughter to communicate because the opportunity to meet brothers and sisters from another country just doesn't happen every day.

Humbled: That’s how I felt when I returned the next Sunday to find the man preaching that morning had translated his entire power point to English so I could follow along. That is an example of service. Of sacrifice. Of love. Such a small gesture spoke volumes about the hearts of the workers in Spain.

One of the girls I met there became a fast friend. Sometimes you meet people who you just “click” with and I did that with Sarai. We spent countless hours during my month in Spain talking and laughing. On our last evening together she declared me as “Spanish in the heart.” That was how I felt. Like a part of me recognized itself as home. Like this was where I was meant to me. I went home and sang the praises of Barcelona and the Christians there. I saw their love and their sincerity…but I also saw their need. I saw glimpses of strengths and weaknesses…and I wanted to help. I wanted to do anything I could to help the wonderful group I met grow. I wanted to teach the lost people in Spain about God and what being a Christian is really about because…well they just don’t know. Over a million people in Barcelona alone don’t know our Savior.

In August 2013, my husband and I officially made the decision to pursue a move to Barcelona, Spain (at this point his love and desire to work in Spain had grown and continues to do so every day). I started teaching in the following weeks and despite our best efforts, we didn't have enough time to fulfill our required duties as well as complete the never ending list of paperwork required for our visas. So at the end of the school year I resigned to devote my time to prepare the paper work. After several months, phone calls, translation advice, and conversations with legal officials we have completed most of the paper work (some are time sensitive and thus cannot be completed until shortly before we move). One step down…two to go…

So much has changed since my first trip to Spain. Our plans are more concrete and less dream-like. My heart has grown fonder of the work and the people in Spain. The challenges that accompany acquiring a religious visa are more real. Impatience, anxiety, and doubt become stronger temptations as time ticks by and we struggle to raise the necessary amount of financial support needed. The feelings of sadness, separation, and isolation that will come from leaving everything and everyone I know are a stronger whisper in the back of my mind. Desperate thoughts to just GET THERE ALREADY scream for my attention while I remind myself: Peace, Be still. Forget all of the reasons why it won’t work and believe the one reason it will. Like Paul, we had plans to be in Spain shortly, but God answered us and said…not yet. So we will wait for the Lord to provide the means necessary to move if it is His will. “The mind of man plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps.” –Prov 16:9

It might take a year. It might take a day, but what’s meant to be will always find its way.

Upon leaving from my first trip to Spain and elderly woman said, “I will see you in heaven.” Regardless of what plans the Lord has for me, I am comforted by the promise of heaven.